Tag Archives: forgiveness

December 8, 2024 · 8:49 PM

The Gift that Keeps on Giving

It’s That Time Again!

As we approach the holiday season, I want to share a meaningful gift idea. It is my memoir, Running in Heels: A Memoir of Grit and Grace. This book continues to resonate with readers around the world with its powerful story of resilience, faith, and forgiveness.

📖 Perfect Gift for the Holiday Season

If you’re looking for a heartfelt gift this year, look no further. Running in Heels is a testament to the human spirit and the ability to overcome incredible odds. It’s a perfect choice for friends, family, or even yourself.

Here’s what readers are saying:

“A moving and uplifting journey that will stay with you long after you turn the last page.” – K. Nelson

“Stunning! Riveting. Raw. The story will break open your heart with Mary’s vulnerability and strength.” – Boymama

“This book will make you grateful for the life you have as you walk through the pain and heartbreak that Mary went through. You will be moved.” – Howard Partridge

Available on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1944952039/

🎁 Special Holiday Giveaway! 🎁

To spread even more holiday cheer, I’m hosting a giveaway! For every book purchased, you’ll be entered for a chance to win a digital download of my audiobook. Simply share this blog post, tag me on social media, and show proof of purchase. Winners will be announced on January 15, 2025.

Let’s inspire others with this incredible journey. Whether for yourself or as a gift to a loved one, this memoir brings hope and inspiration. Thank you all for your continued support! 💖✨

1 Comment

Filed under Book Recommendations, Faith and Spirituality, Holiday Gift Ideas, Personal Stories

Tagged as forgiveness, holiday gifts, inspirational books, Mary A. Pérez, memoir, resilience, Running in Heels: A Memoir of Grit and Grace

May 7, 2024 · 10:38 PM

Dear Mama,

My heart is heavy thinking about you today. It doesn’t seem possible that it’s been a year since you’ve been gone. One of the hardest things was letting go and relinquishing you into God’s hands. He took you home on Mother’s Day around 3 pm. I believe you received the best Mother’s Day gift ever. It was difficult to see you in pain, a prisoner in your own body, lying in that bed. I never gave up on you, Mama! But I had to let you go. You had suffered enough.

In the end, friends and family came together for a celebration of life in honor of you. I’m sure the Lord gave you a glimpse of this side of heaven. You saw your beautiful flowers and heard the music choice. I know you would have been pleased and touched by what was said on your behalf. You were loved. And you are sorely missed.

I think about you often, especially during the holidays. You were always a vital part of our household. You sat at the dinner table, surrounded by family and chatter. You always enjoyed our delicious home-cooked meals. I think about you whenever I cook one of your favorites. I’m glad I can look back at some photos and see you grinning with your plate full! I loved to make you smile. Whenever I’d see a pretty blouse or jewelry, I’d buy it for you. I knew it would please you. Even bringing you a banana split or a vanilla shake did the trick.

Reflecting back, my heart is also heavy for the times I grew impatient with you. I had tried to express how sorry I was for any harsh words spoken out of frustration between us. I’m grateful that our God is merciful, and His grace covers us. We were not the perfect mother-and-daughter role model. Our words weren’t always laced with honey. But we were quick to forgive each other. After all, you were my Mama, and I remained your little girl.

You know, you went with us to Miami. I took some of your remains. I scattered them alongside Grandma & Grandpa. I also scattered them alongside my baby sister, whom we lost so long ago. You always wanted to be near them. I know this was more healing for my benefit, but I wanted you to know I hadn’t forgotten.

Oh, Mama, you have a precious great-great-granddaughter now! You would be tickled-pink and all over her! She was born three months after your passing, two days before my birthday.

Mama. You. Were. Right. You can have ten fathers, but only one mother! Mother’s Day is around the corner. I still imagine you sitting at the dinner table across from me. But your chair is empty now. You are gone, but will forever live in our hearts until we meet again.

I hope you know, you are loved beyond words. Missed beyond measure.

With all my love, always your little girl.

I also took Mama to Puerto Rico with me to scatter some of her remains…

Philippians 1:3 “I thank my God every time I remember you.”

12 Comments

Filed under Mama

Tagged as Faith, forgiveness, God's grace, inner-healing, Mama, mercy, mother-daughter relationships, Mothers Day, Musing, personal, reflection

October 10, 2021 · 5:03 PM

The Birthday Gal

Celebrating the woman who gave birth to me. A mother and daughter’s relationship can be a complicated one. It’s true, we’ve been through some rough and challenging seasons throughout the years! I don’t doubt there will be even more challenges that lie ahead! But I loved her as a little girl then, and I love her as a woman now. If you want to know more, read the book, https://www.amazon.com/Running-Heels-Memoir-Grit-Grace/dp/1944952039.

To Mama: Always and forever I’ll be your little girl, and nothing will ever change that. Happy Birthday, Mama! xoxoxoxo

4 Comments

Filed under Mama's Birthday

Tagged as Family, forgiveness, Mama's Birthday, mother-daughter, personal

October 11, 2017 · 8:41 PM

Celebrating Mama

Someone said, Crying is a way your eyes speak when your mouth can’t explain how broken your heart is.

We recently celebrated Mama’s birthday. While the company and the food were great, I saw Mama in a different light. It pained me to see her that way. Although she had a smile on her face, her eyes reflected pain and discomfort.

Mama is aging and more feeble with time. She’s more of a shut-in these days, and she can barely move. Many thoughts go through my head, along with memories of my difficult childhood past. But that was then, and this is now. Mama is Mama – and she’s my Mama. I’ll take her any way I can get her – flaws and all. Hell, I even have flaws! But what troubles me is not what she and I have gone through together; what troubles me is the present. She is afraid to say what ails her. She doesn’t like the idea of going to a hospital, nor the thought of possibly living in a nursing home one day. She’d rather suffer alone than discuss her ailments with a doctor. I don’t know what to do. She’s never been an easy patient, and she is stubborn.

I. Feel. Hopeless.

I’m praying that the Lord will show us what to do and that Mama will be at peace. I just want her to know that she’s loved and that we want only the best for her. I need her to feel safe and secure and to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that she does not have to fear. Fear has torment. It will consume the mind and crush any hope one might dare to have. Fear troubles the heart and makes one weary.

I believe God is bigger than our fears. I believe He wants us to cast all of our troubles to Him and not grow weary. We are not immune to the sufferings of this life, but because of the Lord, there is always hope. All He asks is that we put our trust in Him and lay our burdens down at His feet. He says to trust Him and lean not unto our own understanding. Not always an easy feat, I admit.

Words may escape me at times. I may grow impatient and miscommunicate my true intentions; my grit and courage may fall short. But while I have breath in my being, I will never give up on the goodness of God! We are a work in progress. I know He will make a way. Look how far He has brought us – He’s not finished with any of us yet!

I. Feel. Hopeful.

I choose to allow forgiveness to remain in my heart. While Mama is still here, I will let her know that she is valued and loved. While it’s true that our roles may have been reversed, she’s still my Mama. And you know what?

I. Still. Need. My. Mama.

So, Mama, I celebrate you. Hand in hand, we will find a way to make everything all right.

I. Love. You.

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*** Running in Heels – A Memoir of Grit and Grace ***
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“The moment I started it, I had echoes of ‘The Glass Castle’. This is recommended for anyone who loved Walls’ memoirs, as they have some strong parallels.” – Kath Cross (blogger).

10 Comments

Filed under Birthday Mama

Tagged as Christianity, familia, Family, forgiveness, inspiration, Musing, personal, reflections, Relationships

May 9, 2017 · 6:00 PM

Confession of a Daughter

I still get jealous.

I confess.

After all this time, it pains me to admit this, but it’s true. Whenever I hear others express the close bond that they have with their mothers, I marvel at how grand that must be!

And it stings.

Mama used to say: “You can have ten fathers but only one mother.”

I heard that line growing up and believed it. After my parents divorced, I had three different step-dads. In my young state of mind, I didn’t want to share my mama — she wasn’t married to any of them. I wanted us to be by ourselves. But Mama was too busy for me. I’m sure she did the best she could, but nurturing wasn’t in her DNA. Left on my own a great deal, I was a neglected child.

Loneliness was my middle name.

At age nine, once we moved to Florida, my grandma was more like a mother to me. I knew then what a mother’s love felt like and it just wasn’t the same as Mama’s. Not long after my daddy remarried, during visitations, my stepmother loved and welcomed me with open arms. I felt special in her eyes. With Mama, sometimes I felt she didn’t even see me because she was so preoccupied. As I became older, bitterness festered and I wasn’t necessarily a role model teenager either. I just couldn’t wait to leave home and do better than Mama, in search of love. I fell flat on my face. But I learned some things.

I learned Mama was a prisoner in her own mind, but she did the best she knew to do. She felt I was always mature for my age, never realizing how much I needed her. I haven’t stopped loving Mama. I loved her then and I certainly love her now. But because I had no choice but to grow up too fast, our roles have always felt reversed. Most of the time, I felt like I was the mother.

The miles separate, the years have passed, and Mama and I both have since aged. I can look back and forgive my past; it has made me who I am today. I’ve had to learn to forgive Mama a hundred times over, whose harshness and demeanor become more passive and feeble with time. I must show her kindness and love. No, she’s not perfect, but neither am I.

Today, I am someone’s mother and grandmother, a.k.a. Mimi. I pray that my own loved ones will always feel my love, even when we don’t agree.

No matter what.

It takes work. Patience. Prayer.

And much forgiveness.

As for Mama and I: Our communication skills remain much to be desired. I’ll keep working on it.

Mother’s Day is around the corner. It has always been so complicated for me in choosing the right Mother’s Day card. Once again, I find myself putting the cards back on the shelf in search of the one that describes Mama perfectly.

I think I’ll continue to write one for her myself: 14572937_10211331684595701_5234886440039336664_n

To my one and only Mama.

I loved you then.

I love you now.

No matter what.

Love always, still your little girl.

11 Comments

Filed under Mother's Day, Mother/Daughter

Tagged as forgiveness, Mama, Mothers Day, Musing, patience, personal, personal growth, Prayer, Relationships

February 11, 2016 · 8:54 PM

“I Always Loved You…”

“I always did love you, just had too many problems.”
Ten words on ink and paper.
Handwritten by her.
Pierces my heart.
Quiet pain.

Does she know I exist? Or care? Or want me?
I love her, look up to her; want to be her.
Unspoken. Forsaken.
Isn’t love also a verb?
Hidden shame.

Grandparents notice. Embrace me. Love me.
They say I am worthy and special.
I am not allowed to stay.
Said I might become spoil.
Wounded heart.

I leave home. Searching for Mr. Right.
Run to him at sixteen. Happily ever after.
Young. Naïve. Taken for granted.
Thinks to mold me into his image.
His way or the highway.
Internal screams.

Motherhood. Baby having babies.
Crawl before walk. Stumble. Fall.
Clinging unto a strand, unraveling.
Faded dreams.

Years overlap. Encumbering.
Emotions are numb.
Hubby seeks greener pastures.
Two-timer. Tosses me to the wolves.
Abandon.

Water not missed until the well is dry.
Alone. They’ve aged. Reaching out.
Across the miles, calling my name.
Vowing eternal devotion.
Hollow words.

Grown children look back.
Open arms. Nostalgic.
Rebuild the fences.
Dying to live.
Forgive.

In times of happiness, embrace your beloved.
In times of calamity, hold them closer.
Love isn’t love until you give it away.
God grants life.
And second chances.

~ Poem written by Mary A. Pérez ~

heart-300x235

3 Comments

Filed under Love, Valentine's Day

Tagged as Family, forgiveness, love, nostalgic, poem, Relationships, time

January 22, 2016 · 2:36 PM

My Story

One of my cousins from across the miles posed a couple of great questions, giving me food for thought. He asked:

Why do you write? And why do you write about the family?

My answer to him:

First of all, I write because I know I have a story to tell. As a kid, eventually, I discovered we were dirt poor. In my teens, looking back, I realized that I was neglected and forced to grow up too fast. I was ashamed of my childhood and bitter for being my mama’s mother. As I “matured,” settled down, married, and had children of my own, along the way, I found I was a stronger person because of some of the things that I endured as a child. Once I embraced the God of my grandparents, I became a much better person, too. NOT that I had it all together; I still had a few things to learn. But I learned it was much better to let go of the bitterness and forgive than to hold onto the junk. I also learned that I didn’t have to be a product of my environment! I could rise above the ashes like a phoenix and become so much better. That was my freedom — still is — and God has called us to liberty, not to be in prison. Sure, I made some mistakes along the way, but I also learned from them. It starts with a made-up mind! While I’ve managed to confront my past, I believe my past hasn’t spoiled me, but has prepared me for the future. I may not be perfect, but I can wipe the crud off and walk on whenever I stumble. I share my story that I might help one person, and if I have done that, then I have done a good thing, and God gets the glory.

I mention family because the little girl growing up — although she may have felt like she was all alone most times — was not an orphan and did not live on an island unto herself. There were others around who helped to nurture her in one fashion or another, even the antagonists in her story. And yes, some were heroes. She cannot tell her story without mentioning those she looked up to. For it to be truthful, she had to address some honest and raw emotions and mention the flaws — the good, the bad, and the ugly.

The story is not fiction. It is written about how she remembers the events that shaped her life as a child, a teenager, and into adulthood. All the memories do not take her to a happy place. She has had to dig deep to find them. To some, those “happy” places may be simple and insignificant, but to her, they were her lifeline.

His response:

I am keeping this to remind me what it takes to be selfless.

Thanks

I did not expect THAT answer 🙂

4 Comments

Filed under Inspirational, Memoir, Running in Heels

Tagged as Big Daddy Weave video, encouragement, forgiveness, freedom, hope, inspiration, life, memoir, personal, writing

February 14, 2015 · 7:30 AM

“I Always Loved You …”

“I always did love you, just had too many problems.”
Ten words on ink and paper.
Handwritten by her.
Pierces my heart.
Quiet pain.

Does she know I exist? Or care? Or want me?
I love her, look up to her; want to be her.
Unspoken. Forsaken.
Isn’t love also a verb?
Hidden shame.

Grandparents notice. Embrace me. Love me.
They say I am worthy and special.
I am not allowed to stay.
Said I might become spoil.
Wounded heart.

I leave home. Searching for Mr. Right.
Run to him at sixteen. Happily ever after.
Young. Naïve. Taken for granted.
Thinks to mold me into his image.
His way or the highway.
Internal screams.

Motherhood. Baby having babies.
Crawl before walking. Stumble. Fall.
Clinging unto a strand, unraveling.
Faded dreams.

Years overlap. Encumbering.
Emotions are numb.
Hubby seeks greener pastures.
Two-timer. Tosses me to the wolves.
Abandon.

Water is not missed until the well is dry.
Alone. They’ve aged. Reaching out.
Across the miles, calling my name.
Vowing eternal devotion.
Hollow words.

Grown children look back.
Open arms. Nostalgic.
Rebuild the fences.
Dying to live.
Forgive.

In times of happiness, embrace your beloved.
In times of calamity, hold them closer.
Love isn’t love until you give it away.
God grants life.
And second chances.

Poem written by Mary A. Pérez

15 Comments

Filed under Love, Valentine's Day

Tagged as Family, forgiveness, love, nostalgic, poem, Relationships, time

Aside

Confession of a Daughter

I’m jealous.

I confess.

I don’t think I ever grasped this concept until now. It pains me to admit this, but it’s true. Whenever I hear others express the close bond that they have with their mothers, I marvel at how grand that must be!

And it stings.

Mama used to say: “You can have ten fathers but only one mother.”

I heard that line growing up and believed it. After my parents divorced, I had three different step-dads. I didn’t want to share my mama; she wasn’t married to any of them. I wanted us to be by ourselves. But Mama was too busy for me. I’m sure she did the best she could, but nurturing wasn’t in her DNA. Left on my own a great deal, I was a neglected child.

Loneliness was my middle name.

At the age of nine, after we moved to Florida, my grandma became more like a mother to me. I knew then what a mother’s love felt like, and it just wasn’t the same as Mama’s. Oh, to be sure, I love my mama; she gave birth to me. But because I had no choice but to grow up too fast, our roles had always been reversed. Most of the time, I felt like I was the mother. I wasn’t a model teenager either, and couldn’t wait to leave home in search of love.

The miles separate, the years have passed, and Mama and I have both aged. I look back and forgive my past; it has made me who I am today. I’ve had to learn to forgive my mama a hundred times over, whose harshness and demeanor become more passive and feeble with time. She’s not perfect. And neither am I.

I am a mother now. And I pray that my own children will always feel my love.

No matter what.

It takes work. Prayer.

And much forgiveness.

Our communication skills still have room for improvement. I’ll keep working on it.

Mother’s Day is around the corner. It has always been so complicated for me to choose the right Mother’s Day card. Maybe this time I won’t have to keep putting the cards back on the shelf in search of the one that describes Mama perfectly.

Maybe, I’ll write one for her myself:

To my one and only Mama.

I loved you then.

I love you now.

No matter what.

7 Comments

May 2, 2013 · 9:56 PM

April 3, 2013 · 2:52 PM

Time

“I always did love you, just had too many problems.”
Ten words on ink and paper.
Written by her.
Pierces my heart.
Quiet pain.

Does she know I exist? Or care? Or want me?
I love her, look up to her; want to be her.
Unspoken. Forsaken.
Isn’t love also a verb?
Hidden shame.

Grandparents notice. Embrace me. Love me.
They say I am worthy and special.
I am not allowed to stay with them.
She said I might become spoiled.
Wounded heart.

I leave home. Searching for Mr. Right.
Embraced him at sixteen. Happily ever after.
Young. Naïve. Taken for granted.
Thinks to mold me into his image.
His way or the highway.
Internal screams.

Motherhood. Baby having babies.
Crawl before walking. Stumble. Fall.
Clinging unto a strand, unraveling.
Faded dreams.

Years overlap. Encumbering.
Emotions are numb.
Hubby seeks greener pastures.
Two-timer. Tosses me to the wolves.
Abandon.

Water is not missed until the well is dry.
Alone. They’ve aged. Reaching out.
Across the miles, they call my name.
Vowing eternal devotion.
Hollow words.

Grown children look back.
Open arms. Nostalgic.
Rebuild the fences.
Dying to live.
Forgive.

In times of happiness, embrace your beloved.
In times of calamity, hold them closer.
Love isn’t love until you give it away.
God grants life.
And second chances.