Monthly Archives: December 2013

Aside

Circle of Life

Once upon a time there lived a lonely girl. Intimately acquainted with an empty stomach, she carried hunger in her heart, starving for love.

In spite of her destitute and inner turmoil, she grew up and broke away in search for love. Eventually she’d marry and have a family of her own, never dreaming how they’d fill the void in her heart.

In the circle of life, her little ones grew to have little ones of their own.

She felt young at heart again, and couldn’t imagine life without them.

And the not-so-little-girl wasn’t lonely anymore.

The end.

10 Comments

December 30, 2013 · 9:29 PM

Quote

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas to all – from our heart to yours.

2 Comments

December 24, 2013 · 11:28 PM

December 19, 2013 · 10:17 PM

Farewell …

If I didn’t know better, I’d thought he was peacefully napping.

In the hospital, time stood still as I gazed down at the man who fought his demons since I’d known him. Vivid memories of our fifteen years of marriage before it ended many years ago, churned in my mind’s eye: his dimpled smile, lilting voice, broad shoulders, bow-legged stance, the shuffling of his feet when he walked, his unselfish generosity. Recurring thoughts raced through my mind of all the what ifs? At that moment, nothing else mattered. I remembered the good and not the bad, his strengths, instead of his weaknesses, his triumphs instead of his failures.

Anna Marie barged into the room, rushing to his side as if to wake him from sleeping. “Dad! Dad!” she shouted, shaking him. “Dad!”

“Anna,” I spoke sharply and held her hand still. I softened my tone, “He’s gone.”

“But why, Mom? Why…?”

“Anna, I don’t know. It was his time; he was ready to go. He never wanted to grow old, become a burden . . .” my voice trailed off. I recalled what he had said, how he wouldn’t live past sixty, as if sixty was old, too old, and he never wanted to get “like that.” How soon the years pass.

“No, Mom!” Anna Marie shook her head in disbelief, red face. “Not yet!” she sobbed.

I held her tight and cried with her.

Soon the others arrived. We gathered around. My baby girl, Angela, was nine months pregnant with her first and due any day. Naturally, I was concerned for her well-being. But when she gently placed Donny’s immobile hand over her swollen belly, I broke down.

As always, Mark — my husband of eight years — was there by my side to comfort me.

(A short excerpt from Running in Heels – A Memoir of Grit and Grace)

Note: Eleven years ago today, the father of my children sadly passed away. It was just six days before Christmas. Ten days after bidding him farewell, the cycle of life continued as we celebrated the birth of our grandson.

I am reminded of this passage of scripture: “To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: a time to be born and a time to die …” Ecclesiastes 3:1,2

9 Comments

Filed under death, Memoir

Tagged as death, fairwell, grieving, life and death, memoir, personal

December 11, 2013 · 10:36 PM

Through the Eyes of a Child

I’m ready!

So for my post this week, I celebrate my granddaughter, Grace, turning seven years old. She is a miracle, a bundle of pure joy with a remarkable outlook on life. She can make my husband’s heart melt and she still makes mine skip. Her bubbling personality and radiant smile beam brightly. She teaches us about life, and we celebrate the beauty of living through her eyes.

My birthday gift for Grace was to take her to see the Nutcracker Ballet Show. Now, I’m not much for heights, but our seats was in the nosebleed section. As I white-knuckled the guardrails and gingerly walked down each narrow step, fighting vertigo, Grace didn’t have that problem as she bounced along ahead to our seats.

With every squeal, giggle, and clap, watching the show through the eyes of a child is magical in itself. But for those who don’t realize just how much of a magical moment spending time with Grace is, you will need to go here – Amazing Grace

This was indeed a special time. And I wanted to share this moment with my readers.

Going to the “Nutcracker” 2013

“It’s taking too long.” zzzZZZzzz

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Snack time

New Friends

15 Comments

Filed under Fun, The Nutcracker Ballet

Tagged as ballet, birthday, fun, granddaughter, Nutcracker

Aside

She Was Me

Alone in my own world, I sometimes pretended to be Shirley Temple. Her dimpled smile and blonde curly-locks got her noticed. I imagined if I pouted like her and smiled like her that I’d be pretty like her. But in the bathroom mirror, a brown-eyed, freckled-face girl peered back. She had straight dark-hair and dingy clothes that hung loosely over scrawny legs. She looked plain, clumsy and insignificant. She was me.

I didn’t know we lived below the poverty line. I knew the hunger pangs that clawed at my belly. I remember eating cold pork and beans right from the can; it tasted really good with bread. I remember surviving for a timed on government surplus with tins of soft butter, brick cheese, powdered milk and creamy peanut butter. When we had it, smearing slabs of mayo over bread was a slice of heaven.

Food was scarce. Even after Daddy started sending money to Mama, I saw little food on the table. Liquor bottles and empty beer cans reeked and saturated the air. Constant bickering between Mama and my step-dad punctuated the tensions in our rodent-infested, cockroach matchbox. I’d see those creepy-crawlers on the walls, tables and dirty dishes on the counter. I’d hear them scratching behind the walls, or running across the linoleum floor. I could even smell them. Those pests were our relentless unwelcome guests.

(Excerpt from Running in Heels – A Memoir of Grit and Grace)

Note: “What happened to your bangs?” I am asked this question countless of times. You will have to discover the answer to that question … but not until my book is published. 😉