Category Archives: musing

I consider myself a tough cookie. After all, aren’t I a survivor? I’ve lived through more than my share—broken home by age three, poverty, hunger, homelessness, neglect, loss of a sibling at nine, violence, abuse in its many forms, and more than a few close calls with death.

BUT God!

However, there is a softer side to me as well. This thing called tears. Yes, a family member has even called me sentimental.

I cry over a lot of things. Losing a pet, or even an insect. A newborn’s first cry. A book, a song, a dance, a wedding, a movie. Sometimes even opening a gift or saying goodbye catches me off guard.
Mountains, rainbows, oceans, hummingbirds… they move me more than I care to admit. And when my grandchild called me “Mimi” for the first time, I completely lost it.

And yes, sometimes I cry when I’m hurt, scared, tired, or angry.

I don’t always want people to see that side of me. I’m supposed to be tough. Not weak. Remember?

Now I’m not much of a horse person, but I know enough to know that a horse is all grace and strength—every muscle, tendon, and ligament working together to carry a rider at full speed. Yet even that kind of power is guided by a bit in its mouth, moving where it is led.

When I read about Moses, I’m struck that he was described as the meekest man on earth. And when I read about Jesus, I see power beyond measure, yet fully restrained. His meekness was never weakness.

So, I say: It’s okay to let our guard down at times and reveal our softer, sensitive selves. It doesn’t mean we’re a softy, a weakling, or a pushover. Power under control means self-control, and that is a virtue. After all, we are human with God-given emotions. Besides, God bottles our tears.

And because God loves us so much, sometimes I wonder if God cries too.

© M.A. Perez 2013, All Rights Reserved