“I Always Loved You …”

“I always did love you, just had too many problems.”
Ten words on ink and paper.
Handwritten by her.
Pierces my heart.
Quiet pain.

Does she know I exist? Or care? Or want me?
I love her, look up to her; want to be her.
Unspoken. Forsaken.
Isn’t love also a verb?
Hidden shame.

Grandparents notice. Embrace me. Love me.
They say I am worthy and special.
I am not allowed to stay.
Said I might become spoil.
Wounded heart.

I leave home. Searching for Mr. Right.
Run to him at sixteen. Happily ever after.
Young. Naïve. Taken for granted.
Thinks to mold me into his image.
His way or the highway.
Internal screams.

Motherhood. Baby having babies.
Crawl before walking. Stumble. Fall.
Clinging unto a strand, unraveling.
Faded dreams.

Years overlap. Encumbering.
Emotions are numb.
Hubby seeks greener pastures.
Two-timer. Tosses me to the wolves.
Abandon.

Water is not missed until the well is dry.
Alone. They’ve aged. Reaching out.
Across the miles, calling my name.
Vowing eternal devotion.
Hollow words.

Grown children look back.
Open arms. Nostalgic.
Rebuild the fences.
Dying to live.
Forgive.

In times of happiness, embrace your beloved.
In times of calamity, hold them closer.
Love isn’t love until you give it away.
God grants life.
And second chances.

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Poem written by Mary A. Pérez

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Filed under Love, Valentine's Day

Tour Through Blogland

bloglandI was invited to participate in “A Tour Through Blogland,” also known as “The Virtual Blog Tour Award.” When my nominator, Sally Georgina Cronin introduced me to this project, she peaked my interest. After all, I just published my memoir and am pretty excited to let others know of its soon release date.
>>>Click here to see more!<<<

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Pre-Orders Available Now!

Available in hardcover, paperback and e-book!

Orders are rolling in!

I received a message from Chart House Press earlier this week which blessed me: “Seeing the orders come in is bringing me to tears, Mary. I can’t wait for people to read your story.”

Purchase thru Amazon
Purchase thru Barnes and Noble

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Filed under Book Marketing, Running in Heels

Running in Heels: A Memoir of Grit and Grace

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The Year 2014 in Review

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2014 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

A New York City subway train holds 1,200 people. This blog was viewed about 5,800 times in 2014. If it were a NYC subway train, it would take about 5 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

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‘My desire is that my story may help someone else walking through similar circumstances I once walked,’ Mary Ann Perez author of Running in Heels

About a week ago, Natasha Collins with http://literarylifestories.com invited me to be a guest on her wonderful blog and to share with her readers a little about my journey in writing “Running in Heels.” She knew my desire was to reach out to others who are going through or have gone through similar struggles that I mentioned in my memoir.

Natasha, thank you again for getting in touch with me.

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Cover Reveal! Release Date!

Release date: February 24, 2015! Pre-orders available on February 1st.

 

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Results are in from the cover poll! Thank you for your input. Now pop over to Chart House Press to see what our designer did with the feedback! http://bit.ly/1E7Sl5z

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January 16, 2015 · 4:27 PM

STICK-TO-ITIVENESS

I sat by a friend and glanced at her phone which had a word for the day. The word was “persistence.” I like to link it to the phrase, stick-to-itiveness.

I am well acquainted with persistence. Synonym: tenacity, grit, endurance, unflagging. Even so, this doesn’t mean that I find persistence an easy feat. It takes work, and you sometimes have to be like a dog with a bone.

Then I watched an oldie-but-goodie 1962 movie, The Miracle Worker, about Helen Keller. I’d seen this movie many years ago, but I don’t remember it having such a great impact on me as it did this time. We know the story of Helen Keller and all her accomplishments in overcoming great adversity, despite being deaf, blind, and mute, thanks to Anne Sullivan, her exceptional teacher. But Anne Sullivan faced many challenges at a young age as well.

Anne suffered from health problems of her own, growing up in an impoverished home. At a young age, her sight was severely damaged from an eye disease, and at the age of eight, her mother died. She became a ward of the state and underwent many botched surgeries before her vision was partially restored. Anne eventually graduated from a school for the blind. As she sought employment, she obviously became the perfect teacher to Helen Keller.

She never faltered in her belief in Helen, believing “the chick has to come out of its shell sometime.” Anne’s way was to teach while disciplining, because “obedience without understanding is blindness, too.”

Anne’s persistence and determination taught a seven-year-old deaf, blind, and mute child to blossom and communicate with the world. Later on in life, she helped Helen to write her biography.

What remarkable wit of the teacher and the student. What if Anne had given up? So many obstacles to overcome, the endless challenges to not throw in the towel. Anne saw Helen’s parents as spoiling her negative behaviors with rewards, which only pacified her, ultimately doing more harm than good. Wouldn’t it have been easier for Anne not to have cared? Give up? Leave? Instead, Anne’s persistence brought help to the helpless, light into darkness, and knowledge to ignorance. Against all odds, they both changed the course of history. They overcame defeat and did not quit.

That’s the kind of person I want to be. How about you?

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© M.A. Pérez 2015, All Rights Reserved

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Happy Twelfth, Ryan – You Rock!

RyanCollage

 

Having you for a grandson has been one of the greatest gifts life has given me; for all you’ve been, for all you are, and for all you’ve yet to be.

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December 29, 2014 · 12:00 AM

A Baby Changes Everything

 

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December 22, 2014 · 9:47 PM