Some moments in life stay with you. Not because someone intended to hurt you, but because of how they made you feel.
Years ago, I went in for a job interview. Before the interview even began, I noticed the person who would be interviewing me taking a hard look at my shoes. They weren’t expensive, but they were clean, and I had done my best to look presentable. Maybe I read too much into it. Maybe I didn’t. But in that moment, I suddenly felt like I didn’t measure up.
I eventually got the job, but that moment stayed with me.
Later, someone I worked with was talking about the great deal they had gotten on their sports car. They mentioned the amount of money they had saved and asked if I thought they’d done well. All I could think was, what do I know about sports cars? If I had that kind of money, I could pay my rent on time and have groceries!
Another time, a grandchild of someone who worked there asked me, “Have you ever been to Paris?”
When I answered, “No,” she looked at me in complete surprise and said, “You’ve NEVER been to Paris?”
Although it stung, I smiled and answered her. She was just a child. I’m sure she wasn’t being rude. She simply couldn’t imagine someone who had never traveled there.
Looking back, I don’t believe any of these people were trying to make me feel “less than.” They were a little insensitive, maybe, but mostly they were living the life they knew.
What struck me each time wasn’t unkindness. It was a kind of blindness, being so at home in their own life that they couldn’t imagine mine. And I’ve had to ask myself: how many times have I done the same thing to someone else, without ever realizing it?
Still, those moments taught me something I’ve never forgotten: we don’t always know what someone else is carrying.
The person standing beside us may be worried about paying rent, buying groceries, caring for a sick family member, or wondering how they’ll make it through another month. They may smile, show up for work every day, and never say a word about their struggles.
That’s why humility matters.
Humility isn’t only about how we see ourselves. It’s also about being aware of others. It’s remembering that our experiences aren’t everyone’s experiences. It’s speaking with kindness and recognizing that what feels ordinary to us may be something someone else has never had the chance to know.
Those memories have made me more careful over the years. I hope they’ve made me more compassionate, too. I know I may not always get it right, but they taught me to be more mindful of the burdens others may be carrying.
The Lord has a way of teaching us through the uncomfortable moments in our lives. Sometimes He uses them to soften our hearts instead of hardening them.
When I think back to those shoes, I don’t remember feeling angry. I remember feeling invisible. “Less than.”
I never want to make another person feel that way.
May we be people who notice others, who speak with humility, and who remember that every person we meet is fighting battles we may know nothing about.
“Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord and He shall lift you up.” — James 4:10
May we never be the reason someone feels “less than.” Instead, may we reflect Christ’s kindness by seeing people, valuing them, and treating them with humility.
From Heart to Heritage
Reflections From the Heart 