Monthly Archives: August 2023

Daddy’s 90th B/day Celebration/Family Reunion/ Florida Vacation

Some of you know we had to say goodbye to my 88-year-old mama, a little over three months ago. Her memory continues to linger. She was loved beyond words. Missed beyond measure. At times, whenever I enter her room, sadness still floods my soul. I’ve given my grief over to the Lord time and time again, and every day I am strengthened. We did our best to care for Mama during the few years she lived with us. When she went through major surgery, we sought outside professional help.

If you have read my memoir, you know my parents divorced when I was very young. Daddy still lives in Florida with my stepmother. Since their marriage, my dear sister has taken excellent care of them both. I was anxious about visiting Daddy this year for his 90th birthday. Needless to say, it was important to me that I be there.

The day finally arrived when we flew to Orlando for Daddy’s milestone birthday party. However, due to illnesses, etc., this big event almost didn’t happen. I am so thankful the special day came to fruition. We were there to help celebrate this grand occasion.

We enjoyed spending precious time with Daddy, Mama Gloria, siblings, aunts, uncles, and several cousins. Fourteen of us stayed overnight at a lovely 2-story Airbnb. My sister had reserved it, providing more than ample room with a swimming pool. More family members arrived the next day to celebrate Daddy’s birthday bash. We gathered around and ate to our heart’s content. The catered meal included Puerto Rican and Cuban dishes. The dishes were pernil (roasted pork roast) and arroz con gandules (yellow rice and pigeon peas). They also included Congri (Cuban rice mixed with black beans). We had maduros (sweet plantains) and Cuban-style yuca with garlic mojo. Photos were taken with the birthday boy, with cake and balloons.

Mornings consisted of indulging in delicious home-cooked breakfasts with café con leche. We exchanged stories, laughter, great conversations, singing, and prayers. Wonderful memories were made to last a lifetime. Daddy’s party was a wonderful event.

After our stay in the Airbnb, we continued with our vacation plans. We attended a dinner and tournament show at the Medieval Times Dinner Theater in Orlando. The entertainment was fantastic with beautiful horses, jousting, and cool sword fighting. During the performance, a tasty four-course meal was served. You had to eat with your hands, just like in medieval times. Other outings that week included a one-hour ride at Wild Willy’s Airboat Tour through Florida’s Everglades. We experienced some of Florida’s wildlife. We saw blue herons. There were also gators and their nests. We spotted small, beautiful, orange-looking birds. We even saw a bald eagle!  One evening, we visited Old Town in Kissimmee with our cousins. We enjoyed a 30-year-old tradition of classic hot rods and muscle cars in a parade. On another day, the chances of rain did not stop us. We headed towards the lovely Anna Maria Beach. It has warm, clear turquoise water and white sand. The scenery did not disappoint. This was a little bit of heaven for me. It was hard to leave! Finally, we stopped and visited my stepson in Tampa. Surprisingly, he treated us to his mouth-watering specialty: reverse-seared ribeyes, and tomahawk steaks!

Looking back now, I am thankful for all that transpired during our week in Florida. My main takeaway: Daddy remembered me. He remembered all of us. He was present, engaging, and loving. He even said a prayer over us. It felt good to feel his love while hugging him tightly. It was special to see my nieces and nephew and see how they have grown. I reconnected with some cousins whom I hadn’t seen in a minute. It was nice to get to know them.

Remember: family time is essential. Embrace all that God has blessed you with; weed out the pettiness and all that is cumbersome. Life is short and fleeting. You blink and you miss a moment. Count your blessings and focus on the bigger picture on this side of heaven called life’s journeys. It is a gift.

(I especially want to thank Titi Sonia and Tio Manny for graciously putting us up in their lovely home.)

Please enjoy some photos taken of our vacation week.

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Filed under Daddy's 90th, Florida vacation

Full Circle

“Grief is like the ocean; it comes in waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim.” Vicki Harrison

She was weak, frail, with no appetite. I prayed that Mama would make it to Mother’s Day. She did and left us at 3 pm on that very day! I believe she truly received the best gift possible. She no longer has any pain or discomfort. She doesn’t have to worry about anything or anyone else.

I had told her that I would, and I did. Three months had passed. With my immediate family, I took some of Mama’s remains to bury. We placed them alongside her parents, my grandparents. We also buried her next to my baby sister. She was tragically struck down by a hit-and-run driver at the tender age of two, some 55 years ago.

Everyone expresses life and death differently. What we did was another way to honor Mama and her memory. I know that Mama is in heaven, and not in a shallow grave. You see, doing this was more about healing for us. We are at peace knowing we did something to honor her life. Through it all—and there were many bumps in the road—Mama was loved, and she is now with her Savior. In the end: Love. Won!

"Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you.  And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also. And where I go you know, and the way you know.”

John 14:1-4

Here is a snapshot of what this looked like:

Click “Running in Heels: A Memoir of Grit and Grace” by Mary A. Pérez
to purchase through Amazon

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Filed under grieving, Memorial