Monthly Archives: August 2024

Embracing the Seasons

I rarely think about my age. However, my body sure reminds me whenever I throw my back out. It also reminds me of when my knee pops. And yes, in the mirror, I sometimes notice an extra line here or another wrinkle there. I gaze upon certain areas of my physique. I wonder where “it” went and when “that” changed.

From time to time, I muse about my early years. I had to grow up so fast. Then, I had four small children in my teens and young adulthood. The next thing I knew, my twenties were gone, and my marriage was deteriorating. Divorced in my thirties – I felt like a failure, but the world did not end. I remarried by my mid-thirties. Thank God for new beginnings. I can shout from the rooftop that no marriage is so good that it can’t be made better! (You see, I’ve been married most of my life.) In my forties, I embraced the wonders of grand-parenting. In my fifties, I felt the notorious body aches and pains. I found myself being a caregiver to a dear little centenarian. She taught me about living one day at a time.

In my sixties, the seasons changed again for me. This time, I sadly had to say so long to my mama. Within three months, I embraced the wonders of great-grandparenting. And she is GREAT.

As I reflect on this aging process, I realize I don’t have all the answers. However, I believe I’ve learned a thing or two about what life has dealt me. Someone said, “Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be.”

I read Psalms 90:12: “So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts to wisdom.” This passage speaks to me and tells me to make each day count. I must remember to live in the present, not the yesteryears or tomorrows. I must remember to laugh often, love deeply, pray sincerely, and believe that my best days are before me.

Another birthday has come and gone. I can’t help but think: Have I done all I ever wanted to do? Of course, the answer is a resounding no: not even close. Am I running out of time? That’s God’s business. I believe life is a gift from God, and I’ll take each day and cherish the moment. He is the reason for every good thing, every heartbeat, and every second chance. Each. And. Everyday.

I may not know what tomorrow holds, but I know Who holds my tomorrow.

I am thankful for God’s goodness and the love I still see in my grown children’s eyes. I cherish the laughter of my grandchildren’s voices and the giggles of my great-granddaughter. The warmth of my husband’s embrace fills my heart. I am grateful for the scent of rain lingering in the air. The taste of grateful tears streaming down my cheeks reminds me of my joy. I am thankful for yet another year with loved ones and friends.

Someone said age is a myth and beauty is a state of mind. I like that.

May I grow old gracefully, forever blooming where I am planted,
one petal at a time.

“Running in Heels: A Memoir of Grits and Grace” by Mary A. Pérez

3 Comments

Filed under Gift of Life

Carolyn & Ronnie

I have learned that there are seasons for everything. Emotions are up and down. Friends, relationships, and even marriages will come and go. But our God remains constant.

I previously blogged an insert from my book Running in Heels: A Memoir of Grit and Grace. It mentioned Susie’s husband, who became my former husband’s uncommon German buddy. Their friendship lasted a lifetime. I witnessed a feat that God alone could accomplish in that man of mine back then. Did it go as I had hoped for in our marriage? No. But there were lessons learned, and I believe growth took shape inside of me.

Donny completed weeks of treatment for alcohol abuse as an inpatient at the VA Hospital. Afterward, another remarkable friendship soon began to take shape. A bond soon developed. Donny met Ronnie. He was one of the sweetest men I knew. Ronnie was married to Carolyn, the sweetest woman I knew (and still do). Known for being a “completed-Jew,” Ronnie loved Jesus and shared the love of Christ with others. Ronnie was not one to reserve his affection. He never shied away from giving Donny a couple of his bear hugs whenever they crossed paths. I believed that because Donny had no siblings, Ronnie’s warmth filled a void in him. Ronnie became the big brother he never had. There wasn’t anything one wouldn’t do for the other.

Donny had always been a giver, but spending time with Ronnie taught him genuine compassion. My former husband had a heart after all, and he had begun allowing others to see it. Carolyn assured me that Ronnie was also learning about his willingness to take risks from Donny. Our husbands were worlds apart, like salty pretzels and sugar cookies. Amazingly, we saw them caring for and loving each other as true brothers. It’s been said that God works in mysterious ways.

Years later, our dear friend Ronnie became gravely ill. After a few months, we were shocked and heartbroken to learn of his passing. The news shook Donny to the core. But one thing for certain remained. Donny had learned to love. He then grew to miss someone significant in his life. Undoubtedly, our dear friend Ronnie left a lasting mark; he blessed and affected all he met.

Sweet Carolyn, one of my sisters & forever friends with her sweet Ronnie!

Present: I recently had lunch with sweet Carolyn and reminisced about our husbands’ unique friendships those many years ago. We remembered how they had a mutual love and respect for one another. “They both loved to fish together,” Carolyn said, “and Donny was there if Ronnie ever needed help with anything physical.” Whatever the task, she commented on how Donny did it right and graciously. “Those two were peas in a pod,” Carolyn said, “they so enjoyed spending time together.” Indeed, they did, and for several years, Donny walked a straight line and had become accountable.

In retrospect, I learned that you might not remember what someone said. However, you will never forget how they made you feel, and that speaks volumes to this day.

As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend
Prov. 27:17

2 Comments

Filed under friendship